So, if there are regular readers of this blog, you may have noticed some lack of regular posting, or as regular as I used to. This is because my personal life has become far more active than normal, as I have met the woman I have been waiting for my entire life.
This comes on the heals of a relationship that could not have been more wrong, and also almost immediately after me saying to myself that I would remain single for a while. I didn't count on meeting "the one" this soon, nor was it planned, but when it's right, it's right.
So, in the spirit of that, I've been thinking lately about ways I knew this was right, as compared to other relationships I've been in, including my ex-wife. And I decided to share with you all my thoughts on the matter.
And here they are; a few ways to tell if the relationship is wrong for you, or if you've met the right one.
The Wrong One: When you're not together, or in contact, you barely think about her, or relish the break from her.
The Right One: Every minute spent without her is a minute she's SOMEWHERE in your mind, and you can't wait for the next time you see her.
The Wrong One: When she leaves your house, you relax again because now everything can go back to normal.
The Right One: When she leaves your house, it feels like it won't be normal again until she's back.
The Wrong One: You both feel there are aspects of yourself you can't admit to the other, so you both compromise who you are for the other person.
The Right One: You can both be completely natural around each other with no repercussions.
The Wrong One: You tabulate all the favors you do each other, all the times the other pays, gifts you buy each other, etc., and carefully weigh them against how much the other is doing the same. You feel cheated if the balance ever tips in the other's favor (and feel it's entirely fair if it tips in yours).
The Right One: You do favors for each other or surprise each other with gifts because you enjoy seeing the happy look on their face, and neither of you worries about who's paying because you think of your money as each other's.
The Wrong One: Her dream man is some unattainable actor or singer with nice abs.
The Right One: Her dream man is you.
The Wrong One: You often stop to recall what your life was like before you met her.
The Right One: You can't imagine life without her.
The Wrong One: Thinks it's demeaning to be thought of as "yours", because "what am I, your chattel?"
The Right One: Joyfully calls herself yours, and calls you hers.
The Wrong One: When one of you has to move far away, due to work or another extenuating circumstance, they either expect the other to move with them without considering their needs, or they end the relationship.
The Right One: Neither of you could stand the thought of living apart for too long, and would gladly sacrifice something else to be near the other.
The Wrong One: Expects frequent ceremonial gifts or actions from you, and gets angry if there aren't enough of them.
The Right One: Appreciates every gift or action, but mostly just wants the gift only you can give her; yourself.
The Wrong One: Dismisses your hobbies and interests as irrelevant because she doesn't share them, but either fully expects you to appreciate hers, or blatantly doesn't care what you think of them.
The Right One: Your individual hobbies may be different, but you also share quite a few and the differences compliment each other's. You may even find some of the other's hobbies or interests becoming yours after a bit.
The Wrong One: The two of you may talk about marriage, but both of you have back-up escape plans in case things go wrong.
The Right One: You both understand what "forever" means, and talk of marriage comes up because you'd gladly give each other "forever."
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